Should I Clean?

    Are you sitting at home right now watchin' the tube, surfin' the World Wide Web, or just bein' with your loved ones and thinkin' "shucks, I probably ought to clean"? Not to worry! I've composed a list of 5 simple questions to ask yourself before you get off that rump:



1. Do you have company comin' over? 
Yes? Hell, friends who mind a dirty house ain't no friends of mine.
No? What's the point, anyhow?



2. Do you almost break a leg while strollin' through your home?
Yes?  You sit tight. You don't need a hospital visit when you coulda been watchin' The Golden Girls.
No? Why you worryin' about cleanin' then?



3. Is your home startin' to have a smell?
Yes? Break out the febreeze and candles!
No? You go, shug!



4. Are you runnin' out of clean dishes?
Yes? Use them cheap paper towels and make a bologna sandwich!
No? You deserve a medal, sweetheart. 



5. Is your laundry pile takin' over the wash room?
Yes? Get your underpants on and rock that robe!
No? You seem like you've got your life together, darlin'.



If y'all done went and answered "no" to any of these, I ain't even sure why you think your house needs a cleanin'. Unless you're one of them folks that caint stand a little dirt on the floor. But, regardless, here's the moral of the story: whether or not your home is a hazard, or just a little messy, there's always tomorrow..or the next day. You've got plenty of time for cleanin' later, sweetheart. 


"The messiest houses have the most memories."